Superhero Media: Kirby's Adventure

Although I don't review all that many video games on here, I am conscious of the fact that there is really only so far back I can go with the medium. The 1990s saw dozens of superhero-themed "brawlers" released to consoles and arcades, but most lack any real story, so I don't see myself ever bothering with them here. As they are intended as a lead-in for younger gamers, the Kirby series tend to be pretty light on story in general, but the earliest ones especially don't have a lot going on. I can't see ever covering Kirby's Dream Land for example, as the game is really short and the narrative is essentially "King Dedede steals all the food, so Kirby goes to get it back". The reason I actually want to cover Kirby's Adventure (from the Nintendo Entertainment System), is that it is basically the origin of many of the narrative elements that would go on to define the series for years to come. Kirby "lore" is surprisingly deep, but only really between the lines, as there is a lot there, but a great deal of it has to be teased out. For this game, a creature known as Nightmare arrives in Dream Land, and it's up to Kirby to save the day, especially as Dedede has absconded with the Star Rod.

Who and what is Nightmare? Well, that's not super clear, it seems to be a manifestation of the concept of nightmares? And it's come to Dream Land because, at this stage, Dream Land is directly linked to dreams, rather than just being the name of a region on planet Pop Star. Or is it? Here the odd nature of Kirby canon can be a real boon to writing games and scenarios as well as an annoying issue. Perhaps Dream Land could be something like Marvel's Siege Perilous or Nexus of All Realities? That would explain why Kirby, the infant Star Warrior has arrived there rather than anywhere else in the universe, and why Elder Gods, Machine Intelligences and Planet-eaters keep turning up. Kirby's Adventure is also the first appearance (essentially) of Meta-Knight, the last Star Warrior, who is a nasty boss, but is also clearly trying to help and mentor Kirby through parts of the game. Even Dedede has shifted to more of a "friendly rival" stance, with his stealing of the Star Rod being his wrongheaded attempt to keep it away from Nightmare.

If any of this lore and worldbuilding sounds interesting, just be careful before you jump right on YouTube and start searching because, of course, adult men have read way too much into the Kirby games and there are plenty of Lovecraftian takes on what lore is there. And, look, I have enjoyed that kind of thing in the past, and will probably go to that well with my own Ultimate Alliance narratives and games in the future, but the entire concept is a little silly, like a "dark and edgy" reboot of The Smurfs or something. The Kirby series works really well as it is, and takes very little readjusting to fit in with something like Guardians of the Galaxy or Ratchet & Clank, so even if you want the Annihilation Wave or Lady Styx invading Pop Star, you could probably pull it off, though I don't like their chances. Seriously, Kirby has killed Elder Gods, Annihilus is just fucking done if he takes on Dream Land. I wish we got more of these games, or at least the older ones were easier to get a hold of.

Miniatures Finished: Unmatched - Battle of Legends Volume 1

Slowly painting through my growing Unmatched collection continues with "Battle of Legends - Volume 1", not quite the first set in the series, but essentially a "core" in many ways. Although most of the characters in the set are considered pretty weak by now, excepting Alice, this is kind of the foundation of how the Iello sets would look and play. And personally I like playing Sinbad, even if he's swingy.

Medusa, King Arthur, Alice and Sinbad

I much prefer painting the Iello characters to the Marvel ones, as I have the fun little challenge of using a colour palette that matches the assigned base ring for the model. Plus I already own a whole lot of superhero and pop culture miniatures for my Ultimate Alliance stuff, so Unmatched focusing on Mythological and Literary characters kind of tickles my fancy in just the right way.

Superhero Media: Spiderman

Emissary from Hell, Spiderman! Yes, you may know Spiderman (note the lack of hyphen) as either Japanese Spider-Man or Spuidaman, depending on where you first heard about it, but the title is Spiderman in the opening credits, so I'll be sticking to that. Our story begins when aspiring professional motorcycle racer Takuya Yamashiro is caught up in the centuries-old battle between the Planet Spider and the Iron Cross Army, led by Professor Monster. After the death of his father at the hands of the Iron Cross Army, Takuya encounters Giaera, the last survivor of Planet Spider, who gifts the young man his blood so that he may become Spiderman! With his new suite of powers, as well as the supercar Spider-Machine GP-7 and the transforming spaceship Marveller, Takuya is ready to battle evil. Up against him are the Iron Cross Army, with legions of soldiers, Amazoness and her increasingly-terrible wigs and a plethora of cyborg monsters known as Machine Bem. It's pretty fucking amazing.

Like most Sentai and Toku, Spiderman is pretty repetitive, and you really don't need to watch all 41 episodes like I did to get the feel of it, but it really is a lot of fun if you can stick with it. Although Super Sentai technically predates Spiderman, this series codified many of the themes and tropes that would become the standard in the genre, such as giant robots, transforming vehicles and enemies growing giant in the climax. Although you can jump into pretty much any episode of Spiderman and not have to worry about continuity, there is some development over the course of the series, such as the Iron Cross army suspecting that Takuya is Spiderman, Spiderman working with INTERPOL and a recurring Youth Detective Club. Should you just want to check out a few episodes of Spiderman, the first four and last two do quite well, with a surprisingly solid climax that sets an injured and desperate Takuya against the last vestiges of the Iron Cross Army. It's pretty damn solid given the genre and era.

Despite being reasonably obscure outside of Japan, the internet has, almost miraculously, brought Spiderman back into the cultural consciousness. Aside from appearing in the Spider-Verse comic crossover event, Spiderman has been referenced in cartoons, video games and is set to appear in an animated film. Naturally, I've had one in 28mm for a while, though I'd be up for an Amazoness and Professor Monster if I could get them, and it's an easy conversion if you want someone other than Peter Parker filling out the red and blue for a few games. Hopefully, Spiderman is here for many years to come, and Takuya takes his rightful place alongside other alternatives like Miles, Gwen, Miguel and Ben, because he really is just as good and deserves more exposure. It may seem like a big ask, but go track some Spiderman down and give it a watch, trying to push past your cultural expectations and aversion to rubber suits and see what's there. It's not a great programme, but it's bloody interesting and certainly good enough to fill up a slow afternoon.

Ultimate Alliance - China: Part VIII

Hidden deep in the wilds of China's mountain ranges, the massive underground complex which housed The Most Perfect Science Division hummed like a city, for indeed it was. Intended to preserve superior Chinese technology in the event of global catastrophe, the staff of the complex would often not leave for years, telling friends and family that they worked overseas or on isolated ships. The complex housed everything the Party deemed necessary to a productive and healthy life, including an arboretum and a small zoo, including mostly endangered species native to the mainland. Children occasionally were born and grew up in the complex, though those sired without prior approval were taken away to be raised by the state and the parents suitably punished for their indiscretion. The management of the complex was difficult and expensive, but seen as utterly necessary for one of its outputs; the complex provided China with superhumans.

From multiple iterations of the Crimson Dynamo to many of the now all-but-defunct Great Ten, The Most Perfect Science Division had provided their nation with the superhumans needed to compete with the Western "heroes" for decades. Despite having gained his powers through training and study, Most Accomplished Perfect Physician was well familiar with The Most Perfect Science Division, and had no need to follow the broad route lines painted on the floor to help people find various divisions and facilities. Walking along with Most Accomplished Perfect Physician was a sextet of generals and high-ranking Party members, mostly engaged in a circular and pointless argument about the current superhuman conflict in Hong Kong. Every member of the group had a strong opinion they felt the need to voice, though Most Accomplished Perfect Physician noted silently that none had a genuine idea of how to resolve the crisis.

A final, long corridor brought the group to one of the most secure labs in the complex, though technically it existed on its own separate branch that tunneled deep into the mountains. Although the majority of the labs in the complex gave aesthetics over to functionality, this particular one could only be described as deliberately brutalist, calling to mind incarceration more so than research. In many ways the lab was a prison, designed to resist all but the most powerful assaults from both without and within, as it was this very lab where the most powerful members of the Chinese Superheroes were created. The current occupant, the latest incarnation of the Crimson Dynamo (occasionally known as Socialist Red Guardsman) was the focus of the impending meeting, though fixed as he was to a repair rig, he made for a less than impressive sight, despite the bulky armour and ominous red glow.

After a moment of reverent silence, the argument of the generals reached fever pitch, squabbling like children over the need to deploy the new Crimson Dynamo in Hong Kong to stop Inframan and settle the riots once and for all. To describe the option as "nuclear" was not unwarranted, with the latest few iterations of the Dynamo being atomically powered with technology reverse-engineered from observations of the Atomic Robo; it was, in many ways, literally a walking bomb. Accomplished Perfect Physician noted that any scientists, technicians and other civilian personnel had faded to the far side of the room so as to not catch the attention of any of the Generals, having learnt from past mistakes that being the voice of reason was only something that worked in terrible American cinema.

In a style typical for compartmentalised bureaucracy, with which Accomplished Perfect Physician had become intensely familiar since joining the Great Ten, the generals weren't arguing over weather or not they would deploy Crimson Dynamo, that had already been decided, the man/machine hybrid would be going in. The sticking point was as to whom would be taking responsibility for the destruction and all-but-guaranteed civilian casualties that would result from a major superhero fight in a populated area. If things went wrong, like Dynamo getting out of control, the Western superheroes getting involved, or a nuclear incident on what was considered Chinese Soil. Watching the argument circle in the reflection of the Crimson Dynamo's face-plate, it took Accomplished Perfect Physician a moment to register that the 'pilot' had woken up and was silently watching the proceedings. They locked eyes through the red-tinted porthole for what felt like an eternity.

Superhero Media: Luke Cage - Season 2

What can I say about the second season of Luke Cage that I haven't covered already with other Marvel Netflix efforts? It's about three episodes too long, it wastes the potential set up by the first season and it's clear the writers were more interested in making a Crime Drama than a Superhero programme. And it's a real shame, as the first season of Luke Cage was a big deal, full of big ideas and it had a big impact, so that the second doesn't really take many risks or try and do much more than round off plots left hanging is truly disappointing. The overriding 'theme' of the season is the fate and soul of Harlem, and who will be the new king, but honestly, it really should have been about getting the Heroes for Hire together. And I'm not just saying that because I am a big comics nerd, the best parts of this season of Luke Cage are the team-ups and hints that something like the Heroes for Hire are coming.

The new villain for the season is Bushmaster, sadly not the guy who's half-snake, a member of the Yardis criminal gang out of Jamaica, and whilst this adds an interesting element of a new Colonial perspective of Blackness, that the decision was made to have him be almost as strong and tough as Luke really undercuts the conflict. There are some really smart scenes where ordinary criminals try clever ideas to get around Luke's invulnerability, and because the power is so straightforward, the fights look great on-screen. But whenever Bushmaster turns up, it's just two guys punching each other again. Not that a low-powered beat up can't be fun to watch, the fight with Misty Knight and Coleen Wing and some drunks in a bar is one of the better in the season, and feels like a lead-in to more, but it isn't. Similarly, the episode where Iron Fist turns up to help is probably the best Danny has been outside of The Defenders, but it's just the one and nothing else happens. I know that with budgets and contracts and all, Heroes for Hire was unlikely to happen, but it just seems as if it would have been much better than this.

Even musically, the second season of Luke Cage pales to the first. Yes, there is still plenty of great African American music, but not much in the way of Jamaican genres, and the cleverness is gone. Remember how the first season coded Hip-Hop as "bad" until Luke takes down a drug den with "Bring da Rukus" blasting? Yeah, none of that here, just some kind of mixtape of Black music that really doesn't feel thought-out. Given the distance of time that I now have from the Marvel Netflix experiment, I'm wondering if the team behind Luke Cage already suspected that the writing was on the wall and that there would be no third season? The set-up of Luke as the new crime boss of Harlem has some merit, but feels forced compared to the sheer joy of the Heroes for Hire segments. Again, I'm not all that sad to see the back of this series, as it didn't seem to be going anywhere that I want to follow, and the first season remains "in amber" for me to enjoy whenever I feel the need. Just one more of these to go, now.

Thinking Out Loud: The Big Bang

Look out folks, I'm back on my Stardust the Super Wizard bullshit, so this one's going to get pretty esoteric. For those who are new to this blog or just skip over everything that's not a film or television review, Stardust is the titular character from an almost-forgotten Golden Age writer, Fletcher Hanks. Think Golden Age Superman with less of an ethical framework and no real limit to his powers. Stardust has enjoyed a strange popularity in certain corners of the internet, being truly a unique character who's Public Domain and kind of like Superman if you squint hard enough. The entirety of Stardust the Super Wizard is available online if you look, and is worth reading at least a couple of issues. Fair warning, Fletcher Hanks himself was a terrible person, so if Family Violence is going to upset you, don't dig too deep into his personal history.

Most retellings of Stardust, with one notable exception, tend to make the character more heroic, which is pretty interesting, because although he certainly 'fights evil' in his own comics, it would be hard to call him a hero in the traditional sense. Stardust turns up after the damage is done (or at least after it has started) to punish the perpetrators, often lethally, sometimes fixes the damage, if he feels like it (or if Hanks left enough panels) then zooms off into space once more. Alan Moore chose, in The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, to paint Stardust as a villain, defeated by Captain Universe (probably not the one you're thinking of) and imprisoned for all eternity like one of his own victims. But that's not really what I wanted to get off my chest today, I'm here to answer an important question (or, at least, important enough that I think about it way too much), just what is Stardust?

In the classic comics, Stardust is referred to as a "man", who has gained his abilities through mastery of science, but in that he may not necessarily be human. For starters, Stardust is huge, only shown to be shorter than characters referred to as "giants", and his physique is often exaggerated and vaguely inhuman; almost like something trying to look like a human but not quite getting there. Uncanny valley, if you will. In the webcomic, Super Wizard Returns, the author posits that Stardust is some kind of living solar entity and the physical body that interacts with the universe is merely some kind of projection or shell for consciousness. Well, at least I believe that's the intention? There's room for interpretation there. That idea kind of works for me, as it opens up ideas of characters like Solaris, The Tyrant Sun and even Great Old Ones and the C'Tan from Warhammer 40,000. With the reading of Stardust not being heroic so much as brutal and borderline malicious (or at least capricious), his being an alien entity impossible to comprehend makes a certain amount of sense, right?

So let's borrow some ideas from Warhammer 40,000 and Lovecraft's inheritors, and posit that Stardust is an intelligence born of a star; something so removed from human experience that we simply cannot understand each other and with a power scale nearly immeasurable. After eons of existence, the intelligence becomes aware of other life in the universe, but all attempts to make contact result in immolation and destruction. Perhaps there is a moment or two of pure awe in the mortals this being contacts, before they are killed by its very presence, and it comes to crave that devotion. After better observation, this being comes to understand something of temporal and three-dimensional existence, though its logic is flawed, and it crafts itself a suit, a skin of starmetal. With a name it has chosen for itself, Stardust, the solar being sets out to get the awe and worship it craves, but how? Well it just so happens that something new has entered human culture, the Superhero.

Stardust enters the human world in the wake left by Golden Bat, Superman and Namor, seeing the love, fear and awe that they inspire with their heroics; and he wants a piece of that action. Of course, Stardust doesn't understand any of the nuance of what he sees, so his approach to crime-fighting is direct, brutal and with little consideration for justice, it's like a child playing cops and robbers. At first the other heroes of the Golden Age admire Stardust, as he turns back tidal waves, returns gravity to the planet and deflects asteroids, but soon doubt creeps in. Stardust's violence and wholesale murder begins to escalate, actually raising tensions between nations due to his preference for the United States and drawing the globe closer to a second World War. The time has come to do something, but can even the combined power of Earth's Mightiest Heroes stop this alien monster birthed in the heart of a star?

Superhero Media: Kolchak - The Night Stalker

Oh hell yeah! I was randomly flicking through SBS On Demand one afternoon when I found that the entirety of Kolchak The Night Stalker was available to watch. I was house-sitting at the time, with a couple of older dogs, so something fun to binge whilst the elder napped on my lap was a good way to fill the afternoons. Although Kolchak is a classic cult series for a number of good reasons, I do have to warn that as it was made in the 1970s, there is plenty of sexist and homophobic material in the programme just as a matter of course; it didn't stop me from enjoying it, but I can see it being more offensive to others. Carl Kolchak is a reporter for the Independent News Service in Chicago, who has the rotten luck to keep encountering the supernatural and sublime while he's chasing stories. Despite having exactly the kind of budget you'd expect for a niche broadcast television production of the era and dealing with flying saucers, vampires and underground lizard people, Kolchak is somehow one of the most grounded and sober series about the supernatural I've ever seen.

For those seeking a superhero connection for all of this, Kolchak isn't all that far removed in concept from comic characters like Doctor 13 or even Constantine, or if we're prepared to go wide, I can see shades of Carl Kolchak in Spider Jerusalem. I think what makes Kolchak so enduring and engaging even now is how smart it manages to be at times, such as in an episode where an alien is killing people, the alien is invisible to human eyes, so all interactions are filmed with clever staging and light-play to create the impression that something is lingering just out of sight. It honestly works great, much better than a rubber suit would ever have. Of course, there are plenty of rubber suits and dodgy masks, but some great direction and interesting locations make the finished product greater than the sum of its parts. As a fan of classic Doctor Who, I have a high tolerance for cheap pre-CGI effects, but things like the Magma Dragon in The Caves of Androzani still really disappoint, so I was pleasantly surprised as how restrained Kolchak allowed itself to be.

For most of your games, Kolchak probably won't be providing a great deal of inspiration, but I do recommend watching it for just the sheer joy and interest of the series. Although comparisons can be readily made to later programmes like Supernatural, The X Files and Project Blue Book, the wry humor and 1970s cynicism make Kolchak a pretty unique entity in the history of television. Yes, it's dated and there are a few "yikes" moments to the modern sensibility, but the quality is solid and the acting is perfectly on-tone for what's being presented. Also, there's a few guest spots by actors famous for M*A*S*H, which is pretty cool. Naturally I'm now considering a Kolchak-style character in my vampire skirmish game, but who knows when I'll be able to get that off the ground in any serious way, so don't bother expecting any of that happening in the near future. Seriously, this is a great series and well worth your time to track down and watch.