Superhero Media: Kriby Star Allies

The very first video game I owned was Kirby's Dreamland 2 on Game Boy, I don't know how many hours I would have played it for, but the game and character stuck with me, and to this day, I'll play every Kirby game I can get my hands on. When the Nindendo Switch was announced, I promised myself that I wouldn't buy one until there was both a Kirby and a Smash Bros game on it, as they were likely the only games I'd play enough of to make the investment worthwhile. Well, the drop of Star Allies and Smash Bros Ultimate announcement meant I picked up my Switch and, of course, got stuck into Kirby Star Allies right away. Our adventure starts with dark crystal hearts raining down upon the planet of Pop Star and corrupting the inhabitants, once again it is up to fledgling Star Warrior Kirby to save the day. Most Kirby games since Dream Land 3 focus on a gimmick, a new mechanic to tempt in new players, in Star Allies, it is the ability to befriend enemies and run around with a team of allies to help in the adventure. 

The main story of the game is a little on the brief side, but by the end, Kirby has taken down an ancient doomsday cult and battles what can only be described as an Elder God in an epic boss fight unlike anything in any Kirby Game I've ever played. There's enough replay value there with the other game modes and needing to collect all the items, but I can see why non-fans may be a bit miffed by paying full price for this one. Personally, I'm happy with my money spent, because I know I will replay it again and again. An ex-girlfriend of mine had a theory that if you broke the price of a video game down into a price rate based on hours played, you'd get a better idea of what you had actually paid. Say I paid $60 for a game and played it for 30 hours, that's $2 per hour, which is really pretty cheap when you compare it to the cinema, theater or live sports. Personally, I think the price of admission was worth it for one element alone, the Spider-Hat: 

Kirby has spider-powers now! And the hat is, itself, a spider! What more could you want? Actually, the Spider-Power is one of the best in the game when you hit the bosses, spinning the one big or three small webs around the boss will tick their health down nicely. I've been chewing through "The Ultimate Choice" sub-game with the Spider-Powers as a major boost. As good as it is, Kirby Star Allies is never really going to win over a lot of fans, it's a bit too easy, it's not the best thing on the Switch and it's not as good as the previous few Kirby games. I, however, really enjoyed the game and will be drawing a lot of inspiration from it, especially the villains and the expansion to the Kirby "universe". I'd wish for a Kirby game that explores the origins of the protagonist and the mysteries of the setting a little more, but I've seen enough examples like Batman Zero Year and Wolverine Origins to know that such things are always better in my imagination than the reality. Pick this one up if you can, though maybe wait for a price-drop.

Miniature Finished: Frost Giant

Finished repainting a Heroclix Frost Giant; 

 He's a big boy, no plans to do more than one at this stage. 

 Hard to tell from the photos, but the mace is taller than most 28mm miniatures. 

Hasslefree 28mm Bateu is a big guy, but still looks up to the Frost Giant. 

Superhero Media: The Defenders

Much like Iron Fist before it, I really struggle to understand the vitriol aimed at The Defenders; there are countless videos on YouTube decrying the series and dissecting why it "doesn't work". What the hell were those people watching? The Defenders is pretty great, hitting all the right notes and the flaws are down to the usual Netflix restrictions like budget and contracts. Starting on their own independent investigations, Iron Fist, Daredevil, Luke Cage and Jessica Jones soon encounter each other and learn of the threat that the Hand pose to New York. Cleverly, much of the story happens in the span of a few days, circumventing the typical pacing problems that plague the Marvel Netflix programmes; even Jessica pointing this out in one episode only highlights the benefits of such an approach. As much as The Defenders follows on directly from Iron Fist, elements do factor in from every series that has come before; Matt is chasing Elektra, Luke is looking for missing Harlem youth and Jessica is following a case. 

The star of The Defenders is Sigourney Weaver as Alexandra, the leader of the Hand, getting a brilliant introduction bossing Madame Gau around and revealing that the leaders of the Hand are hundreds of years old. Alexandra uses the last of the Hand's resurrection powder to bring Elektra back as the Black Sky so that the organisation can take the temple hidden under New York and become truly immortal. As New York will be destroyed in the process, our heroes have to band together to save the day, not only the 'big four', but Coleen Wing, Claire Temple and Misty Knight are along for the ride, helping out along the way and in the final battle. The best part of The Defenders, much like in The Avengers, is the friction and eventual camaraderie between the characters, especially Jessica's resistance to the ideas of ninjas, magic and Iron Fist. The first fight, where the four team up to fight goons in a hallway, is extremely well executed, with each of the characters having their own unique style of fighting, the stunt team really did a brilliant job.

As of the time of initially writing this review (July 2018), the next series of The Defenders is on hiatus, as is Daredevil, and Iron Fist seems to have been canceled. I'm hoping that this is more indicative that the Netflix stuff will be brought into the main MCU continuity, but I doubt it. Somehow, despite the quality of production, writing and casting, the Marvel Netflix series have not caught on in a way that Marvel Studios wants to keep producing. If I were a betting man, I'd say that we're likely to see Charlie Cox, Krysten Ritter and Mike Colter in their roles again, but probably with a recast Punisher and Iron Fist, perhaps even a Heroes for Hire film in a few years' time. These are great characters, with plenty to draw on from their comics, stories like New Avengers (Luke Cage), The Immortal Iron Fist, The Pulse (Jessica Jones) and Guardian Devil (Daredevil) deserve the broader audience that the MCU is attracting. Here's hoping for another Defenders outing at some point.

Crystal Caverns - Bot War AAR

Though I'm yet to get too into it here, Bot War is an exciting Indy miniatures game produced in Australia by Trader's Galaxy. The game has a strong '80s Nostalgia Vibe with obvious influence from Transformers, but to stop there would be selling Bot War short, as there are also strong elements of Marvel Comics, GI Joe and even Knight Rider making up the wonderfully vibrant setting and range of miniatures. The minis themselves are also very nice, crisply cast in whitemetal with a decent heft not seen much these days. The rules are simple, but with enough depth that each army uses different strategies and nothing dominates too badly. Naturally, I'm planning to mix my Bot War stuff in with various superhero and Kaiju games already, but that's not to say I won't be playing games in the existing setting as well. To whit; 

On the distant and ruinous planet Syberkron, bands of rouge bots and aliens scavenge for the precious energy crystals they need to survive and power their weapons and technology. Forming naturally around such sources as leaky reactors and old capacitors, energy crystals are well worth fighting and dying for, especially when the other guy's doing the dying. The lowest scum of the galaxy, the loathsome Overlord Gorg and his minions, and the insidious Infestors, Bots who have fallen to their basest desires and turned savage, found themselves in the same rusted section of Syberkron, after the same crystals. 

My opponent, Justin, points out my unfinished Infestors. I did have both Termite and Weevil finished, but Weevil broke in transit. Justin borrowed some of my fantasy figures to proxy the Overlords troops. 

Termite's "Advanced Deployment" special rule lets him start on one of the crystal objectives and count victory points before the game begins. 

Overlord Gorg moves up to harvest his own energy crystals whilst directing his Sharkmen minions forward. 

Fire is exchanged as both sides close quickly, but damage is piecemeal.  

Using their Air Support ability, the Infestors move up quickly, but find themselves overwhelmed by the brutal Sharkmen. 

 Weevil is the first to be taken out of the fight, as I discover that the Infestors are build more for mobility and firepower than close combat. 

Wanting to see how his Combat Scimitars fare, Mantis charges into the nearest Sharkman, but fails to connect when it counts. 

Beetle tries to lay down some covering fire, but in Bot War, shooting is far less brutal than close assault. 

 As the Sharkmen close in, things look bleak for the Infestors. 

As Beetle falls, the victory points swing in the Overlords' favour. 

Despite his massive frame and extra limbs, Termite turns out to not be much chop in hand to hand combat, but some lucky rolling helps him even the score a little.  

The small victory is short-lived, however, as Gorg closes in and finishes off the last Infestor before half of the turn limit has passed. 

As always with learning games, I picked up a lot from this first game of Bot War, like my army being more built for mobility and shooting than close combat and the Overlords have some great synergy out of the box, but that didn't stop it being a hell of a lot of fun. The game is very fast, with even 8 "hits" characters being taken out in one blow with the right roll of the dice. I'm not usually a fan of custom dice for a game, but the Bot War set is both affordable and well presented, with enough dice and energy cubes for two players in most circumstances. The resource management of the cubes makes the game a little deeper where it needs to be and is making me look forward to bigger games and more complex scenarios. 

If you're interested in a fun indy miniatures game from Australia, check out Bot War here:
https://tradersgalaxy.com.au/product-category/bot-war/

Superhero Media: Teen Titans - The Judas Contract

From what I can tell, this animated film is an adaptation of the "Terra" story-line from New 52 Teen Titans comics, but I may be wrong about that, I really didn't do much research sorry, having never really been a Teen Titans fan. As a film, The Judas Contract isn't great, but I've felt that about essentially all New 52 animated adaptations, so I'm suspecting that the problem lies more with the original material than the crew working on the films. The story opens with the 'original' Titans (for this continuity) driving through a city when a sudden alien attack introduces them to Starfire, then there is a jump forward a number of years and the real narrative begins. Nightwing has returned to the Titans, supplanting Starfire as their leader, creating tension, especially around the newest member, Terra. 

Thanks to Young Justice and Teen Titans (animated), I do know who Terra is (had a Heroclix once, too), but The Judas Contract taught me that her real name is also Terra. Now, I used to have a client with that name, so that didn't get to me that much, but why is her superhero name the same as her real name? It's not like Superman calls himself "The Incredible Kal-El". That annoyed me to find out, but I'll admit to getting hung up on dumb facts like that, what really started to get to me were the "romantic" elements of the plot. Teen Titans has always been pretty heavy on the romance, which fits the idea of teen and youth superheroes, and I have no problem with it being a feature of the stories, but it's how these romances are written in The Judas Contract that grates. Nightwing and Starfire are actually well handled, it's nice to see them in a long-term, stable relationship and taking the next steps. 

Beast Boy, however, is stalking and harassing Terra with a dedication that can't come across as anything other than creepy. Take 'no' for an answer or she's well in her rights to call the cops, Gar. The worst though, is Terra's attraction to Deathstroke, which, rather being played off as the adolescent crush of a grateful, but confused, abuse victim on her rescuer, is overtly sexualised in the most creepy way the writers could manage. As in, the language Terra uses to express her feelings to Slade leaves no room for doubt as to what she wants to do with him. Terra is 15, 16[?] and Slade has to be in his fifties, I don't care if he's reciprocating or not, it's creepy and should have been caught by the editor. The Judas Contract is probably one you can skip, unless you really feel like a good scoop of inappropriate sexual conduct with your superheroes. 

Miniatures Finished: 13/03/2018

Steady progress is the best progress, I find. 

 Earthworm Jim is a 3D print a friend found on eBay, he's a little small, but captures the look of the cartoon nicely. 

"Sewer Monster" from Big Trouble in Little China, part of a North Star miniatures set. 

The Spoiler, Heroclix, but another pretty nice one, especially given the character's relative obscurity. 

 Dracula from Studio Miniatures, supposed to evoke Christopher Lee, but reminds me a little of Leslie Nielsen. 

Doctor Doom, a Heroclix I use with my SOTR Latveria army, probably a little big, just did some touch-ups on him. 

Mad Jim Jaspers, Eureka Civilian, was the best I could find, I think the white hat and purple umbrella help bring this class Captain Britain villain to life. 

Superhero Media: Earthworm Jim (Television)

It's rare that I go back to a television programme I enjoyed as a child or adolescent and find that I can actually enjoy it again. I can't actually remember the situation happening where I enjoyed the programme more as an adult, until I gave Earthworm Jim another go. Although the surreal jokes, fast pace and funny noises will keep children entertained, the constant Dune references, existential rants and anti-Puritan sentiment are clearly there for the adults. In many ways, Earthworm Jim is reminiscent of Ren & Stimpy or even South Park, in that it relies upon broad "Saturday Morning Cartoon" tropes to deliver subversive messages or play with audience expectations. As an example, Jim often refers to "The Great Worm Spirit" as a cosmological deity, which is framed as a personal delusion, until the Spirit appears in several episodes and it turns out that Jim's ramblings were accurate. 

Battling Jim is the villainous horde of Psy-Crow, Professor Monkey-for-a-head, Bob the Killer Goldfish, Evil the Cat, Evil Jim and, of course, Queen Pulsating Bloated Festering Sweaty Puss-filled Malformed Slug-for-a-Butt. Jim's origins as a hero are linked to his villains, in that the Super-Suit that gives him his powers was invented by Professor Monkey-for-a-head on the orders of Queen Slug-for-a-Butt, but the delivery was botched by Psy-Crow and an ordinary worm became the Universe's greatest hero. Along for the ride are Peter Puppy and Princess Whatshername, though in the episodes, Jim often rides solo as it's his interactions with the villains that creates the comedy and the Peter mauling Jim gag wears thin pretty quickly. Hank Azaria really carries the programme, but guest appearances from other famous voice actors like Maurice LaMarche make for some great scenes, LaMarche's Orson Welles impression getting several outings. 

Now that these are written so far in advance, I have no idea if you've seen my Earthworm Jim miniature yet, but I've wanted to add him to my Ultimate Alliance games for a while, team him up with the Guardians of the Galaxy and Green Lantern Corps, that kind of thing. I don't think I'll be bothering to add other characters from the series, unless reasonable miniatures present themselves, as most lack the charm and unique set of abilities of Jim himself. All in all, this is an odd little series that may not be to the tastes of most, but is probably worth a look anyway. I doubt I'll ever talk more about the games here, as I'm not much of a retro gamer and my emulator has a habit of crashing in the second level of Earthworm Jim 2; maybe if it pops up on a games service or e-store at some point, but don't hold your breath.