Superhero Media: Men In Black International

After three films, the Men In Black series finally attempts to capitalise on the best premise it had; but it just doesn't quite get there. Personally, I found International to be the best film in the series since the original, but my opinion seems to be in the minority on that. I'd like to believe that the reason isn't anything to do the protagonist being a woman of colour, but hey, that's the world we live in sadly. As a child, Agent M encountered an alien and the Men In Black, starting a lifetime of obsession and attempts to uncover the truth of the agency and to join them. Convincing Agent O, M is sent to the London branch and soon finds herself partnered with the legendary Agent H to solve the murder of an Alien diplomat. It's all pretty standard, really, which I feel is actually the strength of the film, as the drama of the series has always been downplayed as typical for the characters living through it. Of course the Men In Black have to "babysit" alien diplomats, because the whole series leans on the notion of aliens be foreigners.

Nominally, Agent H is the core character of Men In Black International, but unlike many other superhero films that focus on the 'wrong' character, the choice here is clever, with M the audience point-of-view character for the heroic but flawed H. I get the feeling that H is a stand-in for J, though I can't imagine how a broken and failed J would have played with audiences, probably not well. I can see in the film attempts to build a franchise, or perhaps Cinematic Universe, which also appears often in criticisms of International, but if that's something that turns you off a film in this day and age, I wonder how you are able to enjoy media at all? The enemy turns out to have not only been inside the MIB for years, but was, in fact, using the internal secrecy and bureaucracy of the organisation to its advantage, which I can't prove is a criticism of the CIA and American Military Hegemony, but that sure is a reading I'm going to keep making.

If anything is responsible for "letting down" Men In Black International, it would be the script, specifically the dialogue, which is, frankly, bland. I don't get a feel for any of the characters by what they say, only by how they're presented, which makes them seem shallow, as if all are in shorthand, rather than real people. It's a shame because Tessa Thompson, Chris Hemsworth, Liam Neeson and the rest of the cast are all strong actors, but just have nothing to work with; add to this the heavy-CGI and you have a team of excellent actors doing their best to make bland lines compelling while talking to a greenscreen. As much as I've said that Men In Black has plenty of potential in the past, I'm really hoping that International is the end of it for the foreseeable future, because it's only worked the once in all these attempts. Let a few years pass, then bring in a new crew and try for a different sensibility, maybe then we could see an interesting take that moves away from J and the Will Smith shadow over the franchise.

Force S5 - Part I

It all began with the Philadelphia Experiment, that's when they noticed us, and the first mistake most people make when they start thinking about this. Everyone seems to think it was the atomic bomb, and they're half right, as the Trinity Test was what sealed our fate, but once humanity broke the time barrier on October 28, 1943, they were already here. Visitors. The Fifth Kind. Aliens. Whatever language works for you, but that's what they are, and their first experience of humanity was Nazis and the dying days of the Second World War. Those in power noticed the visitors, how could you not, but at that stage only the Americans and the Nazis had the resources to start doing anything about it. Well, also the Mexicans, but that's a story for another time. The Nazis, believing themselves superior to even these new creatures, started to reverse engineer the technology where they could, at their secret Antarctic and Brazilian bases, as well as Poland and Germany herself. You may have heard of Die Glocke (the bell), an early attempt to weaponise anti-gravity fields, but, then again, all of is is something you probably "heard" here or there.

And that's the trick; leak just enough of this into the broader culture so that no one believes it when they see or hear something real. Again, the Philadelphia Experiment is the perfect example, when the details start to work their way out, release a low-budget film that's close enough to the truth, but bad enough to be ignored, and anyone trying to enlighten you looks like a kook from then on. That was the general strategy for the Americans for a while, weponise Hollywood against the general population, foster ignorance and don't worry about the strange lights in the sky. It worked for decades until it started being used against them, ever hear of John Carpenter? Jack Kirby? Tom DeLongue? The pushback is a multimedia project, so yes, you can stream the revolution, on demand. The other big mistake everyone makes is to think of all of this as a conspiracy. You should be thinking CONSPIRACIES. You think the Antarctic Nazis, CIA, Reptilians, Star Children, To The Stars, Shadow People and whoever else are all working the same agenda? Don't be naive, this thing has more sides than you could possibly imagine when you first step through the door. Earth is the sandbox for a war most people will never even see being fought.

So what can I do about it, you ask? How do I fight back? Can we protect Earth from the scum of the universe? Well the bad news is that this whole thing is much bigger than you or I and they have all the money and power we don't. The good news is, there's already someone out there, fighting the good fight, and yeah, you probably heard of them. Forget all the nonsense you've read about the Secret Space Program, "Above Majestic" is Alt-Right propaganda designed to obscure the truth, no kids are being taken and "Pizza-gate" was idiotic. No, Force S5, the Superhuman Soldiers of the Secret Space Service aren't what you think, but they may be the only real way humanity has of forging its own destiny without alien interference or falling to traitors from within like Nazis or the CIA. There's precious few of them, and making more may not even be possible, but that's getting ahead again. You sure you want to go down this road? Last exit before crazy town, make up your mind. Past this point, nothing is as it seems and everything can be questioned; trust me, you'll never look at a can of Fanta the same again. Ok, strap in, we're on a rocket to the stars where aliens exist and you'll spend the rest of your life chasing shadows. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Superhero Media: Star Vs The Forces of Evil

Back when I was last working in a High School as a Counsellor, one of my students was delighted to discover that I was a fan of Gravity Falls and suggested that I may enjoy Star Vs The Forces of Evil on similar merits. At the time, Disney+ didn't exist and I tend not to pirate things, so I said if I came across it I'd give it a go and left it at that. Star Vs The Forces of Evil is pretty damn amazing in the same way that programmes like Adventure Time and Gravity falls are, though it lacks some of the polish that would come later with the new Ducktales, the story grows and characters change in very organic ways and there is a lot for even a jaded adult like me to enjoy. Star Butterfly is the princess of the Mewnian kingdom, who, on her fourteenth birthday, inherits the magical power hereditary to the Queens of her line, but is too impulsive to control her abilities, so is sent to Earth to live with Marco Diaz, a lonely boy who does Karate and is good at school.

Whilst the story starts out with heavy "fish out of water" and "monster of the week" tropes, Star Vs The Forces of Evil soon demonstrates that it has a lot more going on than the initial pitch. The villains change each season, culminating with Star and her friends having to decide the fate of Magic itself. I'd love to wax lyrical about every little shift and how new villains come and go, as Star Vs The Forces of Evil does some of the best world-building and escalation of any television series made for tweens that I've ever seen, but what I really want to talk about is Hot Marco. At one stage, Marco is dragged into the nether-realm of the demon Heckapoo (weird names is a thing in this programme) and spends fifteen years becoming a techo-barbarian warrior legend, who sets the teenage Star into pubescent lust pretty damn hard. Now, I've done a fair amount of Psychothreapeutic work with adolescents, and honestly, about the only programme that covers how they develop romantically and sexually is Big Mouth, but damn if Star Vs The Forces of Evil doesn't come really close in some moments.

Why is it important, or impressive even, that this Magical Girl/DBZ/glitterpunk/My Little Pony mashup engages with sexuality and relationships in between Narwhal Blasts and Ponyhead antics? Well because the relationships, desires and attractions portrayed in Star Vs The Forces of Evil are healthy, and that's pretty damn rare in media for young adults and tweens (Twilight, anyone?). So when Star gets 'revved up' by Hot Marco, or Jackie Lynne discovers her queerness or Eclipsa sacrifices everything for her husband, it feels real; often more real than other soapy superhero fare like Arrow or Gotham. If there is one real issue I have with Star Vs The Forces of Evil, it would be the ending, which feels rushed and leaves things oddly hanging, just in the last few seconds of broadcast, frustratingly enough, so I have to 'headcannon' this one a little. That said, check this series out if you can get past the cutseyness and glitterpunk, it's a damn fun watch and I'm already scouring minis ranges for an approximate Star and Marco (maybe also a Hot Marco) to slip into future Ultimate Alliance games.

Miniatures Finished: Cybermats

Just a quick little addition to my Doctor Who collection that I knocked out, some Cybermats!

Nothing too fancy here, just some of the Warlord Games Cybermats on bases with a splash of silver paint. Sometimes a quick little project like this can get me back in the mood on a project I've sidelined for ages.

Yeah, these aren't too exciting, but I'm glad to have something else done.

Superhero Media: Inspector Gadget 2

One of the most read "Superhero Media" posts on this blog is for the 1999 Inspector Gadget, a little nothing film I reviewed mostly as a joke, not expecting it to do anything. Most of the review doesn't even cover the film, but discusses what would later become a "The Pitch" article about a gritty reboot of the franchise, an article almost no one has read. I mean, no one really reads my blog, in the broad sense, my most popular articles have fewer than 1000 views, and I don't care as I do this for fun and to keep my writing hand in, not for some kind of internet fame. Inspector Gadget 2 picks up essentially where the previous film left off, only with a new cast and a much lower budget. French Stewart is in the lead and pretty much every supporting character is an Australian actor, so I'm guessing this was filmed in Queensland? Seriously, everyone I know from '90s Aussie television gave me some serious whiplash.

Like, sure, get Bruce Spence in, if you're making a vaguely science fiction or horror film in Australia, you're pretty much contractually obligated to use Bruce Spence, but Mark Mitchell and Sigrid Thornton? Is this a reunion of everyone who didn't get crazy famous off Seachange? The film is about as 'good' as one may reasonably expect, with less money to do the slapstick scenes, sets and special effects, large sections of Inspector Gadget 2 look like an Adam West Batman episode, including goons in anachronistic costumes. There seems to be an attempt to move closer to the animated series than the first film, with Klaw using elaborate traps and harebrained schemes to stop Gadget and the latter lucking into winning each encounter. I guess in strict terms of adaptation, Inspector Gadget 2 is 'better' than the previous film, but I maintain that the animated series is not great to begin with, so it should come as no shock that the only reason I go through this film was because I was playing Super Mario Galaxy as it was on.

Given the backlog and that these only come out weekly, you may or may not have noticed that I'm trying to complete series in these reviews. Obviously, series that are ongoing, such as the MCU and DCEU, it's more trying to keep up than finish, but as it stands I still have The New Mutants to round out Fox X-Men, and Men In Black International is in the pipeline. Inspector Gadget 2 was an attempt at this completion, even if it seems only I bother to care about it's existence. You won't be seeing a 28mm Inspector Gadget on my gaming table anytime soon, and I really can't recommend the film to anyone who didn't grow up watching Wonderworld on Aussie television, but if, like me, you really need a break from all the Spider-Man cartoons on Disney+, there are worse things to have on in the background while you paint some miniatures.

Miniature Finished: Great Ape Vegeta

Sometimes I do some odd little projects for my own edification, usually model kits or little terrain flourishes that I don't post here because they don't relate to the overall project. This one, however is pretty much bang-on.

I picked up this Ozeru Vegeta at a games store for around $30, which I thought was a steal. I cleaned it up, removed the maker's mark, gave it a wash and glued it together with lashings of thick superglue. I filled in the gaps with plastic putty, attached it to a base and undercoated it, hoping it wouldn't get sticky as this plastic sometimes does.

And lucky me, it all turned out great. From the beginning, I planned to use the alternate Vegeta colour scheme from his first few appearances, so I used some of the luridly bright GW Contrast paints to get the base colours in, then went in with a hand brush. As Vegeta doesn't go Great Ape until the end of the Vegeta Saga, I had to make some guesses on things like hair colour, but I think it came together pretty well.

As well as being an intended entry for the Australian Plastic Model Expo, this model is pretty nicely scaled for my 28mm Supers games, being able to hold my 28mm Goku in his hand neatly. So overall, I'm pretty happy with how this minor investment turned out.

Superhero Media: Batman - Hush

Ok, here's a question for the Batman fans in my readership, is Hush actually a good Batman story? There are a lot of good elements in Hush, to be sure, and there are so many iconic Batman characters and locations that the story certainly "feels" big, but is it really? At the start of Hush, Batman is basically where he will be at the end of the story, despite the monumental events that will take place between those two points. Although I keep a copy of Hush on my shelf, I'm finding that each time I go back to it, I come away a little more frustrated than the last, and I may be giving the book up at some stage. Starting with a rescue of a young boy held for ransom by Killer Croc, right at the end of his being a criminal and not yet a cannibal monster phase, Batman has a great moment where he tells the boy to lie about it being Superman who saved him, but soon ends up chasing after Catwoman. The relationship between Batman and Catwoman is the heart of Hush, but it gets sidelined at time for assorted Batman nonsense, and sadly, doesn't continue past this story.

What I like most about the romance in Hush is that it truly grows Batman as a character, a point even discussed, though somewhat obliquely, by Alfred and Nightwing throughout the story. Batman having to negotiate the relationship, even dealing with Catwoman's being unwilling to follow his lead in a manner of another Robin or Batgirl, lift the story out of the pre-adolescant world of the caped crusader and show genuine growth in a character that rarely sees it. The rest of Hush is mostly pretty good, but as I hinted above, tends to run as something more of a highlight reel of Batman than a cohesive story. There's that scene where Batman almost snaps and kills Joker, before being stopped by Jim Gordon, and it is tied into the plot, but you could cut Joker out and drop the scene and not really lose anything. I'm not kidding that Hush hits most corners of the Batman universe at least once, from the League of Shadows/Assassins (I'm not sure which they're called in this particular instance), Batman's friendship with Superman and even a maudlin aside from Alfred.

The titular villain, a childhood friend of Bruce's, warped by years of resentment into hunting down Batman and... making his life confusing for a couple of weeks? The details of Hush's actual plan are pretty nebulous, as Batman's life doesn't really change all that much and all of the new characters are dead. Hell, Huntress goes through more of an emotional journey, in that she ends up somewhere different to where she started, rather than Batman continuing on as he did before. Probably the only 'lasting' element of the story, in that it lasted until the next reboot, was the reveal that Riddler had figured out Batman's secret identity. I like this because it places Riddler on a similar intellectual level to Batman, with now only his compulsions keeping him from winning out over the Caped Crusader. The hand-waving over why Riddler doesn't capitalise on the knowledge is a little disappointing, as that would have been a story I was interested in reading, and would have given Riddler a role in the story other than delivering exposition. I'm really keen to know if other people have the same experience with Hush as I do, does it hold up, or does each new reading lessen the narrative?