Superhero Media: Spider-Man 3

Full disclosure: I loved this film when it came out. I enjoyed the hell out of it, warts and all. And I was 18 or 19 at the time too, I remember skipping a lecture to go see it. The fan narrative about Spider-Man 3 is that Sam Rami had a genius vision for the film, but has it "taken away from him" by the studio and producers, resulting in the mess we got. I don't buy that, mostly because that's not really how these things go, and also because, more than a decade and a film degree later, I can see where everything was stitched together. Yes, including Venom (and probably casting Topher Grace, of all people) was directed by Sony to cash in on the popularity of the character, but the infamous dance scenes and the comedy proposal with Bruce Campbell is pure Rami, through and through. When I watched Spider-Man 3 this time, I found I was really analysing it in a way I hadn't bothered with before, because, to use a phrase, the film is a hot mess. 

If Spider-Man 3 were just a bad end to a good series, I think people would forget it, rather than still complain all these years later, but that's not the case. There are plenty of good moments, great characters and fun ideas in Spider-Man 3 that punctuate the narrative and serve to make the bad parts even worse. For example, Sandman is pretty well realised and his story works, right up until the point that he admits to killing Uncle Ben and Peter forgives him with no emotional struggle. I like Harry Osborn becoming a new Goblin and trying to get revenge on Peter, even the amnesia part of the story (very Silver Age), but the costume is terrible and why does he come to help Peter after he beat him and scarred his face? Each story works as a narrative in it's own right, but the film is far too long and the resolution of each story is too brief to really satisfy. So rather than the "too many villains" problem that many like to spout about this and Batman & Robin, I see the issue as more "too many conflicting story lines". 

Or how about "too many characters"? Why are Gwen and George Stacey in Spider-Man 3? I mean, they're there because they're both super important in the Spider-Man comics, but they don't really have much to do and could have been just as easily been Liz Allen and Jean DeWolff for all the difference it would have made. Now I've gone and complained a bunch, there's plenty I enjoy in Spider-Man 3, like Peter having to buy his new "bad-ass" outfit at a thrift store because he's still broke, or Elizabeth Banks absolutely stealing the few scenes she's in as Betsy Brant without trying. How about J Jonah Jameson having another moment of congruence when he fires Eddie Brock for plagiarism and we get to see what his genuine anger looks like rather than the bluster. Aside from the rather offensive accent, Bruce Campbell is great as the romantic waiter, and Stan Lee puts a button for the ages on the introduction. Spider-Man 3 is a mess, but I do still get something out of watching it, perhaps it's latent nostalgia, or just how much I really love the dance scenes, but when I re-watch the Rami trilogy, I never skip this one.

The Pitch: Dragon Ball - Tournament

The internet is full of "takes" on how the characters, world and themes of the Dragon Ball series could be adapted from animation to live-action. As well as the widely-decried Dragon Ball Evolution, there are plenty of fan-films, dodgy international remakes and plenty of work that draws inspiration from the work of Akira Toriama. Personally, I'm pretty much not a fan of any attempt to adapt the vibrant and over-the-top world of Dragon Ball Z to live-action, I just really don't think it works, especially when the focus is on adapting the hair-styles and energy blasts more so than the themes or characters. Now, I have actually enjoyed a few Manga/Anime to live-action adaptations, especially the more recent Japanese examples, like Ace Attorney, and I think it can be achieved stylistically, but I have concerns about how the Dragon Ball world might work with such a transition of medium. 

First of all, I don't follow with the "conventional fan-wisdom" that to be successful, a Dragon Ball/Z/Super/GT adaptation needs to be more "faithful" to the original material. Adaptation is not a straightforward process, it's difficult and rarely turns out as well as one might hope. Pointing at one successful adaptation and claiming that it holds the answers for a different property is a fallacy perpetuated by those who don't have a thorough understanding of the process. So, no, just "getting the guys" who did Ace Attorney or Fall of Man to take a swing at a DB script is not the answer. First off, the entire franchise encompasses thousands of episodes and manga issues, dozens of movies and specials and even video games that all fill in the story to some degree or another, so where would a potential writing team even begin? When looking at the closest allegorical relative to the expansive DB canon, namely comic books, there is a hint of something there, which I tend to name the "broad strokes" approach. 

In the broad strokes approach, characters are adapted in such a manner where the essentials are retained, but the minutiae are glossed over, leaving just enough to wink at the hardcore fans. The Marvel Cinematic Universe Iron Man/Tony Stark is an excellent example of this, with the broader strokes of "playboy, genius, billionaire, philanthropist" intact, but specific elements of the Armour Wars or Demon In A Bottle stories only hinted at. So what then are the broad strokes of the DB franchise? From my take, friendship, adventure, wish-granting balls and, of course, martial arts. Now, the titular Dragon Balls aside, each of those themes have worked well enough in countless films before, and really, the Dragon and his rules are pretty basic, easily introduced in an opening sequence. 

So how do we do this? Well, you know what concept has made for some of the best Martial Arts films in history? A tournament. And what do the DB series have plenty of? Right again, tournaments. Specifically, I'm thinking that the "21st World Martial Arts Tournament" is a great place to start our story. At this stage in the story, most of the main players know each other, the Dragon Balls aren't really a major point and there's plenty of fighting but not too many hoopy powers. The cast would mostly be younger, with Goku and Krillin still being children functionally and Yamcha somewhere in his late teens or early twenties; this would be advantageous because younger actors could be secured before they developed big followings and still be around for later films, such as in the Harry Potter series. 

A note on casting, whilst I appreciate that the Manga style is used, most often, to represent Japanese people, I think casting only Japanese and/or East Asian actors would be a bit of a mistake for a live-action DB film. Not because of any reason other than I feel it would be a missed opportunity to expand the diversity of the cast a little. Although it hasn't been revealed yet, Goku is an alien, so really could be played by anyone suitably masculine and physically capable. Krillin has always had elements of Buddhist/Shaolin monk about him, so why not lean into the symbolism of the Saffron robes and hire a South Asian actor? What I'm saying is don't just hire a bunch of white or Asian actors and call it a day, get creative with the casting and see what comes up.  

As to the narrative and script of the film, it doesn't really need a lot of changing from the Anime and manga. Just make the pacing fit a three-act structure, alter the jokes that don't translate well and beef it out a little; all of the existing beats work, so it's more of a filling-out process. For example, some more lines and development for the non-fighters in the group, like Bulma and Launch would be good, as well as some brief asides that deal with some of the more outlandish elements of the setting, like shape-shifting and animal people. Don't go overboard with exposition, but Oolong and Puar talking about the school they went to would cover things nicely. If we're married to the idea of a sequel tease, a cameo by Tien or maybe Tambourine would do nicely, no need to lay too much in just yet. 

Sorry that this one was more of a "think piece", but all that has been rattling around my head for a number of years, so it was good to get it all out. 

Superhero Media: Hellboy II The Golden Army

I love Hellboy II, perhaps even more than the original. Yes, the tone lightens somewhat and there's more comedy, but heaven forbid that superhero films be fun to watch, right? Following on from the first film, the Bureau of Paranormal Research and Defense is continuing to operate as normal, though Hellboy is trying harder and harder to breach the veil of secrecy and engage with the human world. In this, Hellboy his repeatedly clashing with Special Agent Manning, with whom Abe Sapien has developed a rapport, but the real strain is on Hellboy's relationship with Liz Sherman. Meanwhile, the exiled Fae prince Nuada is closing in on the missing pieces of the clockwork crown that will enable him to raise the Golden Army and wage war on the human world. Whereas Hellboy featured Pulp Nazis and Eldritch Horror, Hellboy II dips into Celtic myth and changeling lore, which can be a little jarring for those expecting more of the same, but gives Del Toro and crew plenty of opportunity for some great creative work. 

Sequences like the Troll Market and the Seelie Court show off what a great team can do with a mix of practical effects and CGI and why the best results come from using both. Del Toro definitely brought the chops his team grew on Pan's Labyrinth and blew it up with all the colour and flair that the superhero genre allowed. The White Wolf World of Darkness game, Changeling: The Dreaming, about fae, looks to be, on the surface, the most hopeful and light in the setting, but on closer examination, is about the slow but certain death of dreams an imagination. Shades of that tragic tone are woven into Hellboy II, with every move that the BPRD makes against Nuada resulting in something magnificent being lost for all time; the Forest God fight makes me want to pick up an Age of Sigmar Treelord Ancient model to battle my new Hellboy stuff at some stage. Add in Johann Krauss, one of my favourite characters from the comics, voiced by Family Guy creator Seth McFarlane, and Hellboy II is a joy to watch. 

When I read criticisms of Hellboy II that aren't "it's not the original" (seriously?), they tend to relate to the tone, which, I'll admit, can feel a little muddled. Hellboy and "His Death" draw heavily on Christian myth, clashing somewhat with the Fae and Celtic elements, but Hellboy and his world have always been a bricolage of themes, which is part of why it's so unique and interesting. The set-up for the third film which never came makes me wistful every time I see it, wondering what could have been and how Liz's choice would have come to haunt her. The real shame is that there is really no series like Hellboy around anymore, sub-par reboot notwithstanding, the design, characters and world are utterly unique and bring something to the genre that Marvel and DC don't. Yes, I think Del Toro and Mignola need to come back to the series, maybe not do a "Hellboy III", but there is plenty of room to explore the setting, be it through the B.P.R.D. or even other characters like The Visitor or Ben Daimo. I really hope this isn't the last we see of this fantastic world.

Miniatures Finished: Infestors

Finished my first lot of miniatures for Bot War, an exciting, Australian-made miniatures game put out by Trader's Galaxy. My chosen faction are the Infestors, alien robots that have lost their individuality and been subsumed into the swarm.

Locust, Roach and Mantis. 

 

Beetle, Termite and Weevil

Despite being a garage operation, the miniatures are crisp, with plenty of detail to work with. I used a Tamyia Aluminum basecoat and GW Contrast paints to make them look like the gaudy, Gen-2 Transformers I remembered from the 1990s. 

Superhero Media: The Fly II

I'm not entirely sure, as I don't spend too much time going over my own old work, but I recall The Fly being one of the first "non-traditional" Superhero Media pieces I covered, in that the film was not truly in the superhero genre, but had elements that worked in a broader consideration of what that genre might be. Being a relatively young genre (I tend to think of Ogon Bat being the true origin point in 1931, though the ur-text nature of 1903's The Scarlet Pimpernel is difficult to ignore), Superheroes have borrowed quite a bit from other genres and storytelling forms that have come before, like Mythological Epics, science fiction and, of course, horror. During the tail-end of the Golden Age, when superheroes were waning, Marvel made its money through Horror comics, a trend that was only ended by the introduction of the Comics Code and the birth of the Silver Age. To hedge their bets, early Silver Age Marvel efforts relied on monster comic elements, like Hulk and Thing, so the idea of monsters and heroes being clearly linked goes way back to at least the early 1960s. Why talk about this and not The Fly II? Well, The Fly II isn't really all that good. 

Following on months out from the previous film, an actress who doesn't look much like Geena Davis gives birth to a Cronenberg blob which hatches into a baby which grows into Eric Stoltz in the span of a few scenes so that we can get an awkward sex scene in the second act. The child, Martin Brundle, is some weird human/fly hybrid, which gives him accelerated aging, superhuman agility and increased intelligence for some reason. Martin must solve the mystery of his father's teleportation technology before the genetic time bomb in his body reverts him into a fly monster. Kept inside a corporate lab facility, Martin grows up knowing only what he's told, taking most things at face value until he works out for himself that his body is changing and there may be nothing he can do about it. The third act of The Fly II is a chase narrative, firstly with security and scientists chasing Martin and his love interest, then with a mutated fly-monster Martin chasing people around the facility, Alien style, picking off his enemies one-by-one. In the end, teleporting with a normal person restores Martin's humanity and the credits role after one last Cronenberg body-horror pop. 

Although The Fly II is nowhere near as good as the original, as a study for a superhero/villain origin film, it actually works a lot better. There is a tragedy to Martin that his father lacked, as Martin never asked for what he has, didn't take the risks himself and just wants to be normal, rather than extraordinary. Would the regret of slow degeneration into a subhuman monster drive Martin to kill, or merely to menace? Is there a version of the character who tries to do good, but is held back by their monstrous appearance? There is fodder here for the kind of "darker" superhero setting that many seem fond of, with Martin being a dark mirror of a Spider-Man style character. Throw in a few elements from Brightburn and maybe even the Carrie remake and you have some twisted, gritty "Justice League" to play around with. Not my bag, but from the kind of interminable conversations I get dragged into, I assume someone wants to get this up and running.

Zooper Dooper Zooper Sayians - Part 6

The 2020 COVID-19 Pandemic hit game stores pretty hard, including the one I work for, and we were forced to close one of our stores to preserve the business. This meant that more than a decade's worth of backstock and unwanted product needed to be sorted through and, often, disposed of. Ever heard of Huntik, Arcane Legions or Conjure? Well, we found all of them in the dark corners of the store room and most went into bins. What didn't get tossed, however, was the huge box of Score and Pannini Dragon Ball Z cards, I got to take them home and spent several days sorting them out. Then another one of our stores decided to liquidate the remaining sealed Pannini stock and I was flooded with cards that I'd only ever really managed to buy piecemeal before. Even back in my Pokemon League days, I'd never really been one to purchase entire booster boxes of cards, I preferred to buy singles (which I still do for some games), so as to not end up with an overflow of unusable Commons. Now, of course, I have more copies of "Straining Outburst Move" then I will ever conceivably use. 

There is a flip-side, in that some of the harder to get cards have landed in my hands, as well as quite a few I was unaware existed previously, such as "Piccolo's Multiform" and "Unlocked Potential", both of which will receive plenty of play. Then again, I was hoping to open two copies of "Garlic Jr's Dead Zone" and only got one; another reason I tend away from blind-packaged collectable games, or at least tend to print the cards I need and buy them later if I can. For my Magic the Gathering "Commander" decks, printing expensive cards and trying them out is a great way to save money in the hobby and I highly recommend it for casual players, like myself, but with FuZion, there's often little choice than to run off what you need on the work printer; the cards just aren't out there. For example, "___'s Guard Crush" is a highly useful card in just about any deck, but I only own one copy, and it only came in special "Power Packs" so is a pretty rare find on the secondary market, even when buying collections. 

So where does that leave me, trying to build decks? Frustrated, is the short answer. I always seem to be one card short of what I want to run in a deck, or have every MP level in foil but one. I currently have three decks (Trunks Freestyle Sword, Majin Dabura Red Beats and Piccolo Namekian Balls) waiting for proxies that don't corrupt and fail to print, but I haven't played a game in months, so I'm not all that bothered about how many decks I can get running. Also still experiencing trouble with finding new players, though some have tried a few games, the reality of the card game versus the expectations granted by the television programme, films and manga tends to discourage. Sure, you can build a Vegeta or Brolly deck that beats face with maximum efficiency, but I'll still be able to avoid combat with my Dr Wheelo deck and make you discard cards until you loose, and that really bothers some fans. I mean, grow up, it's a game? But sure, I can understand that it may be shocking to discover that Krillin is one of the best characters to build a deck around, but Cell isn't.

Superhero Media: Robocop 2

How do you follow up a masterpiece like Robocop? Well, with an inferior film, sadly. With a new director and a script written by none other than Frank Miller, the magic of the original was never really to be recaptured, but that doesn't mean there aren't plenty of enjoyable moments in Robocop 2. Following on almost directly from the previous film, many Detroit Police are on strike after OCP have cut their pay 40% and canceled their pensions, only a handful of scabs, and Robocop, are still on the beat, holding back the biggest crime wave in American history. Of course, at the offices of OCP, everything is going according to plan, because this is still a late-capitalist hellscape with no hint of irony. The city of Detroit is bankrupt, and, according to the contract signed with OCP, this means the city is about to be privatised and run for profit, only Robocop and Lewis stand in the way, poised to save Detroit from rampant capitalism. 

In response to Robocop being more effective and heroic than they originally intended, OCP decides to "upgrade" him after an encounter with drug lord Cain and his gang ends poorly and Murphy is left broken and scattered in pieces. The upgrade is focused-tested by OCP, leaving the new Robocop with over 200 directives and a new, community-positive, outlook. Thankfully, a major electric shock frees Murphy's mind from OCP control and he takes out Cain in a bloody gunfight in an abandoned factory. Meanwhile, OCP is working on "Robocop 2", an edgier, more brutal and heavily-armed version of the original. Is that last part also satire? If it is it doesn't seem to be deliberate, that's for sure. After a few battles, Murphy is the only remaining Robocop, but, once again, Detroit is still at the mercy of OCP, though thanks to the recovery of a stash of drug money, can hold out a little longer. 

Robocop 2 is a disappointment after the first, but the action is still pretty satisfying and many of the special effects are actually better; Robocop himself looks amazing, probably the best version of the character in terms of look and design. Cain and his cronies aren't as interesting as Clarence and his gang, despite some over-the-top concepts like a tween drug kingpin, but the idea of Drugs as a solution for societal malaise has legs and is worth a look. A sadly sidelined plot line involves Murphy trying to reconnect with his wife, which would have been good to explore, but is quickly forgotten by the end of the first act. If you're keen for more Robocop action, Robocop 2 is certainly watchable, if not the cutting satire of the original, with plenty of violence and gunplay. Strap in, though, things do not get better from here on out.

From the Archives - 17

And now some big guys from the figure case that can actually fit them. Storage can be a big issue for some supers miniatures, as outlandish capes and hulking muscles can take up a lot of space that many figure cases don't allow for.

Joe Fixit: I said I have a Hulk problem, that problem being I don't have enough Hulks. Seriously though, how can you pass up this sculpt? So full of character. Heroclix. 

Drax the Destroyer: Classic Drax, cape and all, I picked this one up after seeing someone else's repaint online. He's pretty big. Heroclix. 

The Thing: Who doesn't love Aunt Petunia's Favourite Nephew? The ever-lovon' blue-eyed Thing? Ben Grimm gets plenty of play on my table as he's a great character and a great figure. Heroclix. 

Man-Thing: Another figure originally painted for Necromunda, Man-Thing saw some play as "The Shambler", then a Blood Bowl Treeman before ending up as himself. Heroclix. 

Grey Hulk: My first Hulk, painted for my 40K Ultimates/SHIELD project, hence both savage and grey. This figure is a little harder to find, but has a great look and mass to it. Heroscape. 

Hydro Man: Not sure where I got this one, but the combination of translucent pieces and opaque is really nice. Heroclix.

Superhero Media: Escape from New York

Fun fact, I bought my DVD of this film in a little hipster boutique in Paris; I can't turn the French subtitles off and the film is called New York 1997. No matter what you call it, Escape From New York is a cult classic, with a killer cast and plenty of tension from start to finish. In the distant year of 1997, the island of Manhattan has been isolated and turned into a prison for the worst offenders in America, with the bridges guarded and the rivers mined. When the President's plane crashes on the way to a vital peace conference and the biggest gang lord on the island, The Duke (Issac Hayes), holds him hostage, the only choice is a deniable, and disposable, rescue party. Enter Snake Plissken (Kurt fuckin' Russel!), former special forces soldier turned criminal, recruited by his former CO (Lee Van Cleef), Snake is sent in to save the President, only after having a bomb placed into his neck, giving him a ticking clock for his mission. Along the way, Plissken meets the inhabitants of New York, including Cabbie (Ernest Borgnine) and Brain (Harry Dean Stanton), surviving encounters with colourful gangs and barely escaping New York with his life. 

So Escape From New York is a great film, why bother talking about it in a blog about superheroes? Well, because I have used Snake Plissken in plenty of games already, but also because Escape From New York is the best Suicide Squad film ever made. Make no mistake, Snake faces death if he chooses to not go on the mission, he'll only live if he succeeds, and the chances are slim, but everyone's backed into a corner and options are limited. The Duke, with his fanatical followers and chandelier-decked Cadillac, is right out of a Batman comic, especially with his plans to lead an army of criminals out of New York to conquer the USA once the war with the Soviet Union starts. There's so much fodder here for supers games, I'm pretty shocked I'm the only supers gamer I've seen with a Snake in their collection. Seriously, send the Suicide Squad into No Man's Land Gotham to extract Luthor, or have the Thunderbolts perform a hit in decaying Robocop Detroit, both filled with fun gangs and a ticking clock until the protagonists' heads start exploding. 

Hell, really want to mash genres like in my Ultimate Alliance games? Snake Plissken is the leader of the Suicide Squad, trying to earn his freedom leading c-grade villains on wetwork assignments for the CIA. Because Snake is more of a freelancer than an outright villain, the friction generated when he's working alongside characters like KGBeast or Bullseye would make for great storytelling. Sadly, the "Escape From" series would never reach the dazzling heights of New York 1997 again, even with an expanded universe of comics and a couple of indy video games. Still, if you've never sat through this classic, chase it down on streaming or even DVD and give it a watch, it's a hell of a film.